Monday, February 11, 2013

He sees

This morning I was reading in the second chapter of Job.  After taking everything that Job had, even his family, Satan was talking to God about Job again.  This is what God said about Job:
"Have you considered my servant Job?  There is no one on earth like him; he is blameless and upright, a man who fears God and shuns evil.  And he still maintains his integrity, though you incited me against him to ruin him without any reason." Job 2:3
God noticed Job.  God recognized his reaction.  Job stood strong in the face of trial and God saw that.  This is one of those truths that we all know in our head but sometimes it's hard to see in our lives because it requires faith.  I'm pretty sure Job had no way of knowing that God recognized that.  I don't think God reached down from heaven and gave Job a high five.  Although we see the big picture, Job didn't.  He had to go on in faith.

Weston has been out of town a lot for the past few weeks so most days it's just me and the kids- single mom mode, as I call it.  And it's hard.  (I give props to all of the actual single moms out there.  You are very strong women!)  Leeland and I just get tired of each other.  He is very strong willed and I am not, so I pretty much just feel defeated at the end of every day.  Kinsley is mobile and is into everything.  And she's at that stage where she is eating table food but there's not a lot that she can eat so each meal time is a struggle.  I am worn out.  And since I've been alone, it just feels like no one notices all the hard work I put in to raising these kids.

But this passage in Job reminds me that God sees.  He sees the struggles.  He notices the victories.  He sees the failures.  It is a struggle to have patience with my kids and so many times, I just give up and lose my temper.  But now, when I think about this passage, I want God to be able to say that about me.  I want Him to be able to say "Have you considered my servant Meagan?  There is no one on earth like her; she is blameless and upright, a woman who fears God and shuns evil.  And she still maintains her integrity, though her kids pull her hair and refuse to go poo poo in the potty.  She stays calm when her toddler calls her to his room to sing "Wheels on the Bus" for the seventh time, an hour after bedtime.  And she doesn't get annoyed at her husband for working all the time."

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